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Closer to life

Sometimes, it seems,
you must almost die before
you can sense life.
I almost lost my liver,
my food disappeared down the toilet
and my heart with it. I wretched
and heaved and nothing dislodged
so I carried on until I couldn’t
Get out of bed.
Next stop hospital.
Wide long white days, stretches
of time with nothing but silence
flickering light and sharp stabs
in the lungs, too much pain and time,
bad food and cries in the night.
I persevered because there was nothing else.
Now I can feel my body again.
My mind still shorts a little
but the light is constant for longer now.
Sometimes, it seems,
you must almost die before
you can sense life again.

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