So the last few days have been strange. It’s gone over two months now I haven’t had a drink; I’ve cut out real cigarettes and am only smoking the e-cig, and have also cut out 90% of the refined sugar of my diet previously. This is a great achievement, and something I’d been trying to…… Continue reading Processing with the aid of leafy green vegetables.
About this time of year I always experience a deep sense of optimism and positivity about myself and my own potential. My awareness of the looming date – 1st January – always works to reassure me that all the things I want to achieve are, once again, achievable. This sensation and self belief always begins…… Continue reading New Years Resolutions
I got myself into a bind; now I’m forced to play a waiting game. Hating games hating waiting; not a very fun game because I made up the rules and I’m much too serious for it to ever be fun. I do not mind though. My reward is a hot chocolate or a decaf coffee…… Continue reading No game
In the last two weeks I have cut down my e-cigarette usage by 75%. GO me. I’ve been wanting to do this for years, but haven’t been able to because my e-cigarette is a trusted and highly effective emotional crutch for me. I have been leaning on it for about five years now, and although…… Continue reading Acknowledging a reduction in nicotine..
Sometimes when I look into the mirror I think I see something behind me, something trailing me and mimicking my movements, like a billowing shadow. There are times when my reflection seems to stare back at me- searching for answers in the lines of my face, meeting my eye semi-defiantly, and always waiting for the…… Continue reading The problems inherent in “leaving schizophrenia behind.” (Part 1)
I have just arrived at a new job, quite literally- I just walked through the door to the building five minutes ago. I’m sitting in the waiting room now, because I got here a bit early and my new manager is still on the phone. I’m fairly nervous, although reasonably, I know that there’s no…… Continue reading Starting a new role at work, managing nerves and other distractions.
In learning how deeply entrenched and rigid my own ideas of support work and Social Work were, I came to accept that there are other ways of approaching these roles, and other ways to approach the task of helping a client reach independence and higher levels of resilience. I also came to accept that when…… Continue reading Nine months as a Support Worker, and a fairly steep learning curve (part 4)
Today is the last day of my first ever contract of employment. At my age, you might be wondering- wow, you were lucky enough to find a stable, secure position which you actually enjoyed enough to stay in for what, ten years?! Well the answer to that is no- I’m 33, this has been my…… Continue reading Sunny contemplations, from the office
It was beautifully sunny as I walked into work today. I left Ru at Caterham, as he had an annual leave day and was planning on shacking up at Costa and getting some words written, and took the train to East Croydon as I do every morning. I just made the 7.28 train, a bonus…… Continue reading Musings on a beautiful Friday morning!
I started a new job back in August of last year. I had been volunteering for a homelessness charity for about six months, and when a short term position came up my boss suggested I go for it. It was kind of a dream come true for me- after thirteen years of unemployment and long…… Continue reading Full time work, after a 13 year battle with severe mental illness..