So the last few days have been strange. It’s gone over two months now I haven’t had a drink; I’ve cut out real cigarettes and am only smoking the e-cig, and have also cut out 90% of the refined sugar of my diet previously. This is a great achievement, and something I’d been trying to…… Continue reading Processing with the aid of leafy green vegetables.
Heroine- An image glimpsed in the mirror just before it shattered into a million pieces and the fragments cut my hands and arms, caused blood to seep. Heroine- The dream chased beneath a beaming sun with outstretched arms and breath which blew through the branches, whilst the air itself pulsed and smiled with promise. …… Continue reading Heroine
My body is as wide as a river. My big soul heaves and churns with the wildest waters, whipped up with such a tempest madness. When the pain flows through me, salt water leaves my eyes and my guts constrict, like flapping fish caught in a fisherman’s net; gasping mouths frantically sucking for clear…… Continue reading She-moon
White pill- you are my compromise. Not accepting you means delusion realised. You are my answer to the aches and screams, my solution to the ill at ease, I swallow you whole, yet you consume me, your chemical daze inebriates me, dull daze, dull gaze. While I am with you I can’t claim to be…… Continue reading White pill
Illness swirls around my mind, how can I leave this fog behind? Lights flicker dimly on the edge of sight, beckoning through this constant night. Faces I recognise and voices I know sometimes stretch to me so far below- but my mind is cloaked in dread and doubt how will I ever climb back out? By following…… Continue reading Recovery
On Wednesday I had the best news I’ve had so far this year. A friend of Nina’s messaged me to say that when he visited her that morning she had been much better, and that she had been asking about me and wanted my phone number so she could call me. I got this message as I was walking through…… Continue reading The greatest news ever- I got my best friend back!!
I had a fairly mixed weekend. I went to visit my friend in hospital on Saturday, which was a fairly upsetting day. She is one of my closest friends, and on some levels the friend I am most close to; we met at the Royal Bethlam Hospital and have very similar diagnoses. She is the…… Continue reading Dedicated to a friend (3)
I am lucky enough to have a friend who has the same diagnosis as me. (Lucky in the sense that it means that I have someone to share my experiences with, not because it gives me a really broad and diverse spectrum of people I can claim to be close to). Anyway.. she has had…… Continue reading Why, the phrase”I hear voices” is woefully inadequate in summing up the horrendous nature of mental illness (1)
Strange flashing neon lights- the sun rises up again over the trash cans and the chill retreats for a time. This light reflects in dirty water, puddles as useless and unnoticed as the wet on the homeless mans cheeks. Gun fire stutters through his mind, and his eyes flash with the echoing horror. He huddles…… Continue reading From knee height; a homeless man’s perspective
I’ve been meaning to write this post for a couple of months- ever since I started a new volunteering position. I’m working for a charity which supports, houses and rehabilitates people who are either currently sleeping rough, or who have done in the past and are therefore at risk of doing so again. It’s a…… Continue reading Volunteering for a homeless charity, and counting my blessings..